Rating: PG for allusion to sex and some language
Warnings: Chatspeak, anachronism, abusive punctuation, broken dress code, nauseating descriptions, gratuitous misspelling of "Voldemort", excessive magical ability, Sorting Hat's 'Sue song
Word Count: 2531
Genre: Crackfic, Fandom parody
Characters: Maggie (OC), Madeleine (OC), Louisa (OC), Marvola (OC), Hagrid, McGonagall, Remus, Sirius, James, Peter
Pairing(s): Remus/OC, Remus/'Sue OC, Peter/OC
Synopsis: A new girl arrives at Hogwarts. She's perfect. She's beautiful. She has curves in all the right places. Everyone loves her. Everyone except Madeleine and Maggie, that is.
Timeline: September 1, Marauders' 5th year
Disclaimer: I am not J. K. Rowling. I own nothing. Don't sue me, please.
Author's Note: Part One can be found here. Feedback is my drug of choice. Please let me know if this gave you a giggle. As usual, please report any errors or inconsistencies. This story is dedicated to babb_chronicles and all its giggle-inducing, inspirational badfic quotations.